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Taken
Author: littlered
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(Added on Oct 2, 2004)
(This month 63193 readers) (Total 103273 readers) |
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A young girl is torn from everything she knows and is shown how to be 'the perfect wife'. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 6 |
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17% |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (7/10) |
Average
Rating:  (7.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (3/10) |
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| Reviewer:
JimmyJump
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 3, 2009 |
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Okay, okay, so there's a lot of mistakes here, both in grammar and spelling. But hey, the storyline is great and well written, so why don't we shut-up and stop trying to be English class schoolteachers and praise a story for it's content. It's what I do. Usually.
JJ (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 3, 2008 |
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not bad, no proof reader unless they are professional being paid maker mistakes and I have seem mistakes in new papers (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
chksng19
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 8, 2004 |
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The content of the story was excellent, but, again, an editor would have helped. Spelling concerns and wrong word usage points at a spell-checker instead of an editor.
You really have a lot to say, and some fine ideas. Unfortunately you will alienate much of your audience if they can't understand a part (like the paragraph about circumcision).
I hope to see further chapters!
A wonderful improvement after editing and with the addition of the second chapter. The depth of your writing is beginning to show through, and the main character is much more defined. Still a little concern in Chap 2 as to who is being called "Master". Seems as though in one paragraph you have the son as the Master, in the next it is the father.
Look at the change in score your editor has assisted you in achieving. Your ideas are getting to the reader now! Good job! (7/10)
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- Replied by:
littlered
(Edit) (Oct 5, 2004)
- well, theres the problem then, as i now use a proof reader and obviously he isnt picking up on some of the misakes,
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| Reviewer:
Nitrofox
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 2, 2004 |
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I'm sorry. Perhaps the plot got better as it went on. However, it is impossible for me to read a story, which goes on and on and on, and keeps using commas, in order to continue the sentences, and to avoid using commas. (Any errors in that sentence were intentional). Before I could be convinced to read this piece of drivel again it would have to be significanly improved with respect to grammar/spelling. (3/10)
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- Replied by:
JimmyJump
(Edit) (Feb 3, 2009)
- The fact that there's spelling and other mistakes, doesn't make this story a piece of 'drivel', Nitro.
Your opening sentence also suggests you didn't even finish the tale.
I'm sick and tired of arseholes who get all high and mighty but don't even take the time to read. I did. And although I was also chagrined about the errors, I could see the true worth of the tale.
The real drivel, foxie, is your review.
JJ
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| Reviewer:
Breannefun
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 2, 2004 |
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This story could have received a much better rating from me if the grammer had been correct. There were several spots where spell check had put the wrong word in. "Sweet" for "sweat, and so on. Content however, was wonderful. I could feel the passions of the girl, the bite of the whip, and mental conditioning... can't wait to read about the wedding and honeymoon. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
chattel69
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 2, 2004 |
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Can't wait for the next chapters which I hope are coming. (9/10)
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